Is it Human Nature? Or Just Me?

I get too worked up about things.

Do you ever feel inadequate?
I mean like, to the point where you feel almost disgusted with yourself?
I feel that way.

A heck of a lot lately.

Too much.

I compare myself to people too much I think.

I have this vision in my head of the "ideal me" - the type of person I want to be in life. And I compare myself to people who I think are close, if not exactly like, that ideal vision I have in my head.

This is a bad thing to do.

I get to feel very down about myself.

Very.

And I hate that.

I absolutely hate that.

Pity-parties are stupid & pointless & stupid.

But holy moly, I compare myself, and I feel almost disgusted with myself.

I am not even close to who I want to be.

And there's other people who are.

It seems like many, many others who are.

And they're this bright, shiny, golden breed of people that I just can't become.

Or so it seems.

Why do we compare our lives to the lives of others?
Why do we compare who we are to others?
Or perhaps it's just me who does that.

Maybe I'm a loner here.

I wouldn't be surprised.

It's almost a jealousy feeling.

But not quite.

A bit different than that.

I don't really know how to describe the feeling.

Maybe you already know it, if you do what I do.

If you compare yourself to others & just end up feeling bad about yourself when you do.

Then maybe you know what I'm talking about.

Anywho, I've been doing that a lot lately.

And now all I want to do is cry, I feel so miserable, 

so inadequate, so incomplete.

But maybe I just want to cry because I'm pms-ing.

Too much info?
Meh.

Maybe.

Oh well, my blog, my story, my words.

Anywho, that's my thoughts for today, I guess.

Happy Monday!