Cold Feet

I really thought with summer arriving I would have more time to blog, and I could get back into my old blogging habits...

But I guess not. 

Life is still jam-packed busy...although with nothing all that exciting.

I'm still cranking out those applications.

Still waiting for the phone to ring with an interview or a job.

Still searching.

But I'm delaying applying for my teaching license.

I don't know what it is.

Cold feet maybe?
Can you get cold feet with jobs?

Or is that just a wedding thing?

I don't know, I'm just not in a hurry to apply.

Every day I say to myself, "Okay, today I'm starting my application."

Only then to tell myself, "Well, the process is so long, and I don't have time...maybe I'll do it tomorrow..."

And repeat.

A lot.

I just don't know what I want to do anymore.

I loved teaching.

I loved being in front of the class, interacting with the kids, I got rave recommendations from the people I worked with, but I just don't know.

There's something holding me back.

This nagging thought that this isn't what I'm meant to do in life. 

Sure I'll be good at it, great maybe even, but I'm not meant to do it. 

Maybe it's my brother mocking me all the time about how he can't believe I'm not doing anything with animals...and then my husband always agreeing with him.

Maybe I'm just scared to actually have a "big girl" job.

I just don't know.

Something's nagging at my mind, holding me back...and I gotta figure out what it is.

On a much different note, it's 27 days until Thomas and I leave for our honeymoon! We are both super excited.

We'll be going to Santa Ana, California, and our main destination is....drum roll please...Disneyland! 

Yes, we're awesome. 

I've been reading and planning for our trip for a few weeks now, and everything's really starting to come together, which is super fun and exciting.

27 days.

Maybe I'll never stop having countdowns in my life...