Wednesday, May 12, 2010

An Answer to my Prayers

Last Fast Sunday I had quite the revelation come to me, which I would like to talk to about. First, I'll explain what Fast Sunday is to those of you who aren't Mormon and may be confused...The first Sunday of every month is Fast Sunday, and we have what's called "Fast and Testimony Meetings." On these Sundays you fast for whatever your heart desires. It can be for missionary work, for strength through troubles you're going through, for friends or family, for anything you want. So you fast breakfast and lunch, and then at church, as a part of your tithing, we have a Fast Offerring, where you offer the money you would have spent on those two meals as a fast offering and the money goes towards food relief services around the world. Then the church meeting that day is different than usual meetings too. It's kinda like an open mic type thing. The time is open for anyone to go up to the podium and bear their testimony about the church and their faith. It's my favorite day.


So, that's Fast and Testimony in a nutshell. So the last Fast Sunday, I had a revelation. I almost always bear my testimony, except this Sunday I didn't feel the Spirit prompting me to say anything, so I didn't go up. Well, a couple minutes of silence went by, so our Branch President went up to the podium and started calling on people to bear their testimony. I was crossing my fingers he wouldn't ask me to come up because I felt I didn't have anything to say, and I hate being put on the spot...BUT! Go figure, as I'm staring down at my hands avoiding eye contact, I hear President Roell's voice ask me to come up and bear my testimony. Dang it! My heart starts pounding, palms sweating, I had no idea what to say...but, I took deep breathes and reminded myself to just let the Spirit talk through me and tell me what to say...


I started talking about prayer. I talked about how God answers our prayers in His own time, when He knows we're ready for the answer, and He answers in His own way. I started talking about how we may not always recognize when God answers our prayers because it may not be what we expected or what we wanted...but it's what we needed. And that's when it hit me...


...I've been praying for strength through Tom's mission. I started praying a little while before he left, because I knew I would need it. I knew this was going to be the longest, hardest two years of my life, and I knew I would need lots of strength and help from my Heavenly Father to get through it. Up until last Fast Sunday, I didn't think God had really answered my prayers because it's still sooo hard living without Tom. It's still as hard as it was day one, so I didn't really think God had answered my prayer and given me strength...but that's when I realized He answered it in a way totally unexpected to me, and I just missed it. He gave me the Parker Hall Staff.

These girls are the most amazing girls, my first real friends I've had my whole life (with the exception of two people). God didn't answer my prayer by making my struggles easier, or giving me strength, or erasing this hole in my chest; He answered my prayers by giving me a support system. He knew how hard this year was going to be for me, so He placed me in Parker Hall. This was all part of His plan for me, and I wish I would have seen it earlier. I am so grateful to be surrounded by friends who make me laugh when I want to cry, who know when I need chocolates, hugs, and a good chick flick, and who listen to me ramble about letters and emails and an invisible boyfriend they've never met.


I'm so grateful to have had this support system, and I'm even more grateful that Heavenly Father answered my prayer...even though it took me awhile to realize it.

5 comments:

  1. FYI - in situations like the one you encountered, it is also appropriate to decline to share any testimony - if that's what you would prefer.

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  2. I know, but I feel like if the Branch President is asking me to bear my testimony, than God has something He wants me to say. That's how I see it anyway!

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  3. Maybe - that's one way to look at it. I prefer to recognize a distinction between things God wants and things my church leaders want.

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  4. :) It's so cool to realize when God has done something in an unexpected way! I guess that's the way He rolls, huh?

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  5. Who loves Katie? Megan! Is it true? Mhmmm Mhmm I do!! Who else will be there to take pictures of me as I fall and we get lunchables, or bring me liquids when I am dying of thirst!! Or give me amazing hugs! Or be my TWIN!! ^_^

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