Goodbye Res Life

Alright, so here it is:

The post I've been waiting to write for quite a while now.

My "goodbye" post...I've sat down to write this about a dozen times, and can never get out what I want.

My work, my life, in Residence Life has officially come to an end.

And I just cannot wrap my head around it.

I've been involved in this life since my freshmen year of college. And now, four years later, as I end my senior year, I also end my life in Residence Life. Ah, so bittersweet. This path I chose, the Res Life path, changed my life. Plain and simple. First, I was a desk assistant, then a resident assistant, then a hall manager. Through these experiences, I have built friendships that will last a lifetime, and I have discovered {so much} about myself.

I'm not gonna sit here and write about all my experiences in res life, because, quite frankly, it would be an incredibly long post and I don't think anyone would find it interesting in the slightest. So, today, I just want to say goodbye to my staff and my residents, my Prucha Ladies.

These amazing women of my staff have changed my life. They have made my last year in Residence Life one the greatest years of my life. I love each and every one of them with my whole heart. It's kinda weird to explain the way I love my girls - it's different than a normal friendship. I think it's because not only do I love them as best friends, but they were my "little ducklings" and I was their "mama duck." I feel very protective and yes, almost motherly, over them. So it's different for me than any other friendship I've had. This love I have for my girls, it's from a different place of my heart than I've ever felt before - and yes, I'm aware of that sounding kinda strange...haha.

Anywho, this year was amazing. It was incredibly hard and challenging, but it was amazing all the same. It started off with move-in day. It was SO hard for me to watch my girls with their residents. For the entire week before move-in day, my staff and I had been together pretty much 24/7. We had bonded so fast and already created a million inside jokes and a dozen quotes for our quote board. But then their girls arrived, and I had to watch my girls leave and go take care of their new residents. It was at that moment that I knew this was going to be a very different year than the past two I had experienced as an RA. I was detached from the staff. I was not one of them, I was the "head honcho," the "mom," the "boss." It was going to be different.

But the year went on, and with each passing day, I loved my girls more and more. And as much as I loved my RA staff, I just as quickly began to fall in love with the residents of the building too. Through our programs and events, and just wandering the building in my free time, I quickly got to know most of the girls and they quickly stole my heart. I will never forget one of our first programs we did: Dorm Life Bingo. The turnout was amazing - the room was overflowing with residents! We created the Bingo sheets ourselves, complete with a word bank relating to college and life in Prucha Hall. In that word bank were the names of all the staff members, including myself. When the girls started telling me that I better be a good luck charm because they were putting my name down, my heart melted. I know, I'm a sap like that. But it's true. I started the year so worried that I wouldn't be able to have a relationship with residents because I was the big, bad, hall manager. But it was only September, and already that was not the case. I was beyond happy. All of the women of Prucha Hall quickly became my "babies." I was one proud, protective, happy mama. Every day was awesome.

Throughout the year, we planned tons of programs and events. Some of our more epic nights? Sadie Hawkins, fo sho, is one of the top three. I, personally, would classify it as the number one program of the year. Again, our attendance was popping! We had a friend DJ the event and the place was hoppin'! It was quite a hoot! Our second most successful and memorable night, in my opinion, was our Fun Fearless Female Red Carpet Event. Our turnout wasn't great - I think the final head count was only 17 girls - BUT! It was amazingly fun! We ended up jamming out to music, dancing all over the place, and it was just a fun fun fun party! Plus, we all got dressed up, and that's always fun in and of itself, right? ;) And our third most epic program was Disco Mania Night at the roller rink. I already spent an entire post bragging about that night, so I won't elaborate much on it now. :) Just know that it was so epic of a night, it made top three in my book. ;)

As the year went on, I was on cloud nine: absolutely loving life, my job, my staff, and my residents. This life was the life, and I thanked God every night in my prayers for the opportunity to be a Hall Manager...until April 7, 2011. I came back to the hall after my weekly meeting with my supervisor to 7 police cars and two ambulances outside my hall. I ran back to the building to find cops everywhere and the entire professional staff in my hall. Kersten Greene was found dead. That day, those first few moments, will forever be burned in my memory. I remember collapsing in Tracy's (my boss) arms. I remember the initial thoughts running through my head, "What could I have done? How am I going to tell my residents? My staff?" I remember Sandi (another boss) standing my hall office with us, calling the counseling services, and saying "We have a staff member who needs immediate help." Within about five minutes, I was getting texts from residents asking what was going on. In about ten minutes I was getting texts from friends off campus asking if a resident in my building really was dead. In about fifteen minutes the entire counseling staff was in my building. From then on, the entire day is a blur. I remember Rob (another boss) bringing us (my staff) McDonald's for lunch at some point. I remember Jennifer (a counselor) in my apartement with me, my staff, and residents all day and other counselors coming in and out. I remember how gorgeous of a day it was outside. I remember hearing students outside laughing and playing sports and being angry at them.

That day, left a huge mark on me. I realized that day how much of myself I invest in my job, my girls. I realized that day I easily I fall in love and love others. I realized that day how incredible of a staff and building I had. I realized that day, that if this had to happen to any hall, Prucha would be the strongest one to handle it. It was beyond amazing to see all the women of the building come together. It was amazing to see residents caring for each other - all the hugs, words of comfort, and even words unsaid. That day was a defining moment of my year, in both negative and positive ways.

When all is said and done, the year, though full of ups and downs, struggles and laughter, was an incredible year. I can't believe it's over. It breaks my heart. But I could not have asked for a better year to end my life in Residence Life. I could not have asked for better women to share it with. So to my Prucha Staff and my Prucha residents, I cannot thank you enough for the wonderful year full of wonderful memories you all have blessed me with. You all have left an incredibly large mark on my heart. You have changed me. Forever.

{I love you}